The military is the reason we are free to live how we live. The military is filled with men and women making the ultimate sacrifice to keep our countries safe. To keep the war from our doors. To have to be in war face to face and then come home and try to have a normal life then be treated with disdain or met with hate from those you served to protect must be incredibly painful. The reality is we don’t live in a society where every human being has mastered full self-responsibility or even partial self-responsibility. This isn’t a question of conspiracy it is all very simple to me, it all comes down to self-responsibility.It’s so easy for me to find the devil outside and make the world so wrong, and I belong here.
 
When I am disconnected from ‘I belong’ that’s when I cannot see my part in who I am being in the world and what I am supporting. And If I cannot see myself as belonging, well then there is no way I am going to be responsible for everything that’s happening ‘out there’ because that’s not mine, I don’t belong to that. Except I do. I belong to everything that’s on this planet. The war, the hate, the love, the beauty, the sacrifice and the indulgence. To spit at our protectors is a luxury they paid for with their lives. It’s not something I choose to do as I have respect for those who have given all so that I can walk the streets safely and in freedom. So that I can exercise my human rights so that I can have the luxury of taking my freedoms for granted until I remind myself who keeps those freedoms in place. I stand by our military wholeheartedly and am humbled by their sacrifice.
 
The only way war one day will no longer be necessary is in elevated levels of self-responsibility.
 
The military, the police, they only exist to bring integrity to the lack of self-responsibility. I can make a difference in the conversation of war and that starts with my own self-responsibility. As I challenge myself to be responsible with my own perceptions and my own choices and my own conversations that is how I make my footprint in the conversation that is war. Because ultimately war is a conversation, a conversation with my self.
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For me the fear of not belonging has fueled much discontent. And much of me viewing myself as separate from other. However, if I stand in self responsibility I can see I do belong. I am not separate. I am all I see around me. Yes I am unique, each being is unique. And unique does not equate to separate. 
Self acknowledgement does not separate, it expands and unites. For me self acknowledgement and self responsibility dissipate old fears with tender knowing I am connected. It is me I am exploring, the ancient me in many forms. I belong not because of an action, I belong simply by being.

The play is over.

In looking I’ve realized I have spent much of my life subconsciously looking at history like a play wondering where do I fit, what part is mine to take on? The thing is, the play is over. It’s over. I don’t have to follow a role. I can do whatever I want. It’s a worthwhile play to learn from, not a play for me to keep leapfrogging throughout my life in the name of preservation. Not to perpetuate it blindly based on the fear of perpetuating it blindly. 
Every part of history is mine. I belong to every single part of it as it is ultimately about humanity, this planet and its inhabitants. I am not separate from any of it. I am both innocent and guilty. Not from shame from awareness, self love and self acceptance. It is all mine. I belong. With that lesson in mind I am free. The play is over. Who I choose to be now is solely my responsibility.

Transmutation 

I’m human I will hate. Hate is not the issue, it is the relationship with hate. No, I do not vow to not hate. And I don’t know a single human on this planet who does not know hate. My only vow is to be true to myself and to love myself in all of my fallible humanity which includes loving myself when hate comes present. 
It’s not hate that is the issue it is the denial of it which pushes it underground to fester rather than receive it as prima materia asking to be seen and accepted and loved. That is how I transmute the experience of hate into self love. I don’t avoid my human experience. I embrace it then choose self responsibility and self kindness. This is how hate transmutes to love for me.