I am on charnel ground. A place very few speak about, for it terrifies the anatomy to sight. An unrecognized sight in a society of normalized numbness. To connect with the body is wealth. The body poverty fed in disconnect I resist as I sit deep in this sacred ground, this undisguised purity calling me to be with mine.
Objectification cannot exist without first a disconnect from the heart. To be able to look at the nude form and see it’s expression of deep vulnerability, innate innocence and purity opens up the door to see and experience this in self. Can you see his heart and purity? Do you see life force expressing itself? Or do you just see flesh to be ‘done to’?
I am fully worshiped as woman
I feel it in the very fiber of my exist
I allow myself this love
From my Divine Feminine
This humility to open to my own heart
I receive the full love available to me
The honor of the Sacred Masculine
Sharing his Divine Being with mine
This sacred love that is not separate
It is an extension of my self love
I worship the Divine Masculine
As I love myself
My eyes cleansed from fearful separation
I remember He is I
As I Him
God and Goddess in harmony
His strength my strength
His tenderness my tenderness
His tears my tears
We laugh as one
I know my wholeness
As I worship God in me
A call to awakened sisterhood and the end of the man hating pain wall.
You want the goddess? You call to her, sing to her, praise her, call her life? You deny her destruction and in this her entirety? You REALLY want the goddess? Well here she is! Meet me here at the feet of Kali-Ma and lay down your illusion, claim your freedom
and end your hate ride
You point and shame ‘warrior, warrior’ to men, well face me! Face my warrior! Here we are, give me your blades. I will not strike you, I will fiercely smack away every illusion of fight- expect it- as I come to you to touch your heart with fire, can you sit in sisterhood
with me? Or will you flee?
Can you stay here in my raw alcehmy and spew your illusion until it runs dry as I hold no cup for it? Can you be here naked in your soul and touch my ears with your pain? Can you scream, cry until you realize in your fold that you are killing your own heart?
This wall, this pain body wall projected onto men has got to STOP. Transmute the pain and own your heart. Open your eyes to YOURSELF.
Do you know what you are saying when you spread your pain words about men? You are telling me how much of yourself you have not faced. How much of you that you do NOT accept. How much of your own life you have shackled behind your illusionary wall of blaming men. And when your sisters come to tell you with open hearts, ‘be with me, let go of the pain, receive yourself fully’ you shut them out?
You want the Goddess? Then hear Kali roar!-
Goddess worshippers with a blind eye to the Divine Masculine, To Shiva my King, light, my heart, you dare tell me that you praise the
goddess? I don’t think so. You throw your brothers and sisters under the bus to collect in pain and division within yourselves. You create walls within you and blame those around you. This is not heart, this is not mercy, this is not power. This is sadness for you, this is isolation within yourself. You carry a desert within you that you can
never sate until you receive the oasis you are.
There. Since we’re all speaking for the gods suddenly, giving our archetypes authority and voice as it suits us, face my Kali.
I have watched every gender and sex speak and drive the malignant stories of men, illusions spoken as if true. Bitterness is a heavy habit and it spawns hatred fueled behind wall of justification. Leap frogging this fear and hate across generations. It stops HERE.
I do not speak this to ostracize nor divide those who hold such bitterness and hate while lying to themselves and saying they do not, I say this to embrace all of you. Your heart is calling for freedom it sparks in the pain I can feel in your words. YOU ARE NOT DIVIDED. In the illusion you are you perpetuate pain, within and feed the
unconsciousness. It’s not outside of you, you are it.
You’ve been host to this for too long. Divine Masculine has been awake in humanity since the beginning of human, this is not new, as is the Divine Feminine. They exist and are expression of union within. To
fear and hate either is to fear and hate self.
When you say you project your shaming of men, I hear you hate you. And that is a very deep dark sad place to be.
I call you to illuminate.
I call to the remembering and birth of sisterhood. My rage is pure and true, not devoid of grace and connection, a stand FOR. I see you and it’s time to stop hiding from your own power while casting blades from behind wall of justified. You are not so powerless, nor so dead hearted, I don’t buy the illusion and I will not carry your blade to
the hearts of men.
Hold your self true, hold your innocence alive, breathe in your aliveness, your freedom, join the unity within and receive the unity in the breath of your now.
What you project on men, you feed within. Own it or not. Either way it’s your own power and heart you embrace or shroud.
What you project on women, you feed within. That woman, yes that one, the one RIGHT in front of you is alive. She is your sister and I would not want to see my sister in the swamp, surrounded by a wall of filth
she calls ‘truth’. Dedicated to holding onto her pain and shooting it at men with a fake smile and a plastic ‘goddess’ toy in her back
pocket to back up her hateful claims. I REFUSE to leave her in that pain or coddle her illusion she uses to hide from aliveness, I refuse to be an accomplice to the pain she deals to men and herself.
I don’t think so.
I stand here heart true, open eyed, soul screaming- I do NOT accept the pain body illusion of the masculine and men, I do NOT support your wall and I do NOT accept men being told to carry these pain stories as true.
I call to you. The fury in me is a call of heart. THIS is sisterhood, You want the feminine? I’m right here. Wild and awake. Run if you want or stay and touch your own
feminine and be in sisterhood with me. Not the mock sisterhood you’ve been fed, the human and divine where the masculine is seen as is the feminine and neither devoid of inner presence.
The Return of Femininity:
As most of you know, I run the page The Return of Femininity. I originally created this page from a place of arrogance. To tell other women how to be. From a place of dominance in that I felt I had the answers to how women needed to act in order to create balance in what I perceive as imbalance which is really a human created illusion.
I was being a jerk when I first started this page, I own it. And I’m glad I was bold enough to create, in this creation I’ve been able to grow.
It then evolved as I grew with this page. For me, my own experience with femininity mostly originated in the past years [for those who have been with me from the beginning some of this will be repeat, bear with me and thank you for being with me from origin, I appreciate you].
In my 20’s I was still so disconnected with my feminine I felt like a woman in drag dressed as a woman. It wasn’t until 7 years ago that I started to play with femininity, what it meant, what I felt it looked like to be feminine.
I’m still in this play as I open my view to balance, soften into my own feminine. We all have feminine and masculine within. Feminine does not mean woman and masculine does not mean man. It is predominant, however, that we do associate each as the embodiment of either. Feminine energy we generally associate with female and masculine energy with male. There is nothing wrong with this association it is fine, until it is not.
Inside there is a balance the cocreation of masculine and feminine that is inherently in balance. They have to be, life itself is proof of their peaceful cohabitation. It’s individual human perception that creates the illusion of divide and division creates war and silence. I say illusion because the perception of division is not a reality. Perception of said illusion is born of personal blindness within, born of reaction to personal experience.
My perception has predominantly been of the masculine. In me masculine is order, feminine is chaos. Chaos has such connotation of danger for me not talking about women, talking feminine energy itself. I also grew up in this belief that feminine is weak. In order to be a strong woman I must be connected only with the masculine in me. Yet in the same breath the belief that masculine is destructive.
Is it no wonder I could not open to the balance inherent within myself? In these beliefs there is no space for holding the masculine nor feminine as sacred. In his perception there is only division inside, illusion of inner war.
Masculine energy is powerful foundation of survival- order, purpose. Feminine energy is powerful foundation of flourish-chaos. Both hold innovation, purpose and chaos and only together create life. Again this is just my view within myself how they show up within me and in my perception in life. If feminine is treated as the only there can not be a healthy society, just as if masculine is treated as only.
In my opening to see my own innate balance of inner masculine and feminine I’ve started to see the power of the feminine. Now let me be clear, not domination of the feminine, there is no power in domination. Nor subjugation, to be so small as to comply so that my spirit is broken. No. Neither is healthy, neither will do.To hold the feminine as ‘the way’ is not my way, not interested.
What I speak of is the real beauty of chaos, of melting into my full being and connecting with the feminine. Letting go of my judgments of the feminine as frivolous, wayward, weak, etc. Instead opening to embrace femininity as a beautiful powerful part of being.
After all, these archetypes are me. I can push any part of me into my shadow and shackle it, sure. And I will find myself never able to walk through the door free with my ankle chained to the wall.
I can project onto man/woman, my own inner war, I can do that I am human I hold the capacity. Or, I can embrace I am these energies within myself.
If I hold harm to men I am not honoring the masculine within me and killing off a part of me, holding myself captive to my own chagrin. To hold distaste for men is only a reflection of where I have not accepted myself.
If I hold harm to women, I have distrusted my own femininity, disregarded her necessity, made a part of myself out to be useless. It is just a reflection of where I have not allowed myself to be received.
Most powerful of all is embracement I am both energies. And recognition I am above all, human with a spirit center that drives the suit.
Here I celebrate return of femininity within and in my daily consciousness. Not that femininity ever left or is missing in life or in me, that my own perception has blocked her out. I’m no longer coming from a place of fixing, now I’m in adventure. And expressing my adventure as I am and receiving adventure in this exchange of femininity.
To those in my life of all genders and sexes whose femininity continues to leave me in awe, I’m grateful. I am being shown in my life indirectly how to see and be with this energy and oh it is powerful. Has left me in awe as masculine energy has left me in awe, just in different ways, equally as powerful.
Both required for life. Both required for aliveness. Both within the fertile experience of being.
*I also hold the page ‘Loving and Celebrating Men’.