Day 82 of 100 Days of Loving Men

Day 82 of Loving Men

Recognizing cost

What is the cost of ones actions? For instance, lets say when I was little someone who liked the color pink stole my bike and I sprained my ankle walking to school after this happened. Or if my parents or a friend had told me of a terrible thing that happened to them by someone who liked the color pink. If I were to blame everything bad that happened on people who like the color green, what would that cost me?

Let’s say, half the people I know like the color pink. But if I’m blaming them for all of the problems in my life, that costs me my relationship to them.

Eventually, I will get self righteous around those who like the color pink. I will start to resent them. That will then turn to bitterness. Then, no matter what words came out of their mouths, they would immediately be wrong in my listening.

If I listened those who liked the color pink as only capable of bad things, because in my story everything is their fault, the cost is loss of relating. The cost is then disconnect.

When I see these people, I will not want to connect with them. I will not be able to see their innocence. I will start to enroll others in how bad these pink lovers are. I will feel self righteous and justified in my arrogance towards them. I will create hostile environments wherever I go.

The cost is my own life of peace. I cannot live a life of peace so long as I blame pink lovers for all of life and see my life as only woe.

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