BDSM: Guidance vs the illusion of ‘control’

I’m going to share a very clear distinction for those who seem to be very confused between abuse and dominance.

Control, is an ego based illusion that is extremely abusive. It can show up quietly at first and is often not detected until the damage begins to set in.

Control uses a person’s vulnerability against them.

Guidance supports vulnerability in the persons journey of healthy relationship with self and establishing healthy boundaries. Dominance is guidance NOT control.

Control does not hear boundaries, they are irrelevant. An illusion, such as ‘control’ cannot sustain nor create healthy relating in any form.

Guidance, dominance, is in full support and in service of the guided, submissive. There is no illusion of imbalance or power hunger. Both enter balanced in agreement. Dom is the icon of submissive’s surrender to self and/or God/higher self.

I’m a Dom of over 13 years. Please stay safe and healthy and do NOT take on Grey and his counterpart outside of a fantasy. They are not meant to be translated into real life as a relationship goal. Their interaction is abusive.

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